CHAPTER II: BACKWARDS
Updated: May 31, 2019
Throughout my childhood, I struggled with reading. My mother home educated my two older brothers and myself. Yet, unlike my siblings, who quickly grasped the concept of reading, I did not. I struggled, both internally and externally, trying to understand “what was wrong with me”. It wasn’t until middle school, I was diagnosed with Dyslexia, a reading disability that impacts the way the brain interprets letters, words, and symbols. This challenge throughout my early years created a deep belief that I was “unable” which grew into a mindset of insecurity whenever I was asked to read, spell, or share words verbally from a page. Fear gripped me while jokes, questions, and laughs often followed my failed attempts to face my limitation. Things in life often feel this way. Backwards. Unscripted. Unhelpful & Downright painful. Yet as I reflect, I would not change this unscripted plot in my story, because backwards has taught me that I am weak, limited, and all together human but my God is bigger than even my backwards brain. He opens doors through backwards ways, and using personal challenges to remind our souls that we can rest on His strength not our own. He did not take away my dyslexia, but through His grace, provided me the tools I needed to persevere. I have learned to press in, fight hard, face fear, fall down & get back up again through calling on the One who gives me strength. The backwards chapters of our stories remind us to look up for the power to push through & experience the grace of God!